So I am 41 years old and I feel pressure to fit in. It’s ridiculous given my age! I have never really noticed this until this month deciding not to drink alcohol. I first noticed it last weekend at a social event where I felt pressure to drink. It was real in the sense that friends were intentionally telling me to have a wine, stop being silly not drinking, that I am boring when I dont drink… And I can now see this shows up in a lot of areas of my life. I say yes to almost invitation we receive even though I want to decline many of them because I am worried people will think I am boring. When I entertain I prepare food I dont even enjoy eating because I am worried people will think my food is unexciting. I even buy designer clothing and bags not because I even like them, but because I want to fit in. There is a local Adelaide designer (you can probably guess) that all the women my age buy twice a year, we all look the same, it’s like being in year 9 at school again where we all had the same pony tail length, just now we all wear the same denim jacket and for me I do it because I fear that if i dont I will be left off the invite list that I dont even want to be on.
Wow. This work opens up so much stuff. I dont really know what my question is. I just wante do share this realisation that has come about from your coaching in this program. I feel quite free knowing this, but also a little scared. I am beginning to actually buy, eat, cook and drink what I want to not what I think others expect me to and there is some push back from friends. I remember you saying friendships can complete themselves. I feel like this is inevitable for some of my friendships right now and I am ok with this. I need to be right! Thank you xx